Visiting the Dead Sea is one of those things that you are supposed to do when you go to Jordan. Loads of people have it on their bucket lists and want to have those quintessential reading while floating photos to prove they checked it off their list.
For me, I was just ready for it to be over. Maybe it was a combination of a lot of things: I was sick; I don’t like getting naked with other people; I hate public showers; I forgot to bring a plastic bag for my wet swimsuit; the Dead Sea mud dried my skin out like crazy; the water burned the shit out of my sensitive skin; etc. The list goes on.
I went to the Dead Sea through one of the local resorts/day spa places that you can visit through. You’re ushered into a huge “locker” room (where the wooden lockers were mostly broken and didn’t actually lock) and then you traipse around naked into the cold ass showers where the water basically either trickles out or sprays all over the place with reckless abandon. Then you try to pull on your bathing suit before heading out to the water.
When I was there, the beach was flooded with Russians and Eastern Europeans, very excited to pose for every photo they could in the water (it was fun to watch) and just have an all around ruckus time. I was in it more for the relaxation–I thought I’d get some mud, take a little float, feel relaxed and rejuvenated. But no.
I paid the 5 dinar to have a dude lather me up with the Dead Sea mud, which was an experience in itself. This man very obviously enjoyed his job, as all the girls who were in line ahead of me were scantily clad in bikinis and the man very happily spread mud all over them, with a smile never leaving his face. I’ve talked about it on this blog before, but I’m prudish. I don’t like being touched that much by someone I don’t know; I don’t like my parts being visible; and so on. But I always try to push that aside when I travel so I can get the full experience. I was yanked and pulled and prodded, had mud thrown on me and smeared around in places that my bathing suit covered, for reason. My top was pulled down, the bum was pulled up, all so that mud could get in ever crack and crevice. Then he wrote something that I hope is beautiful across my chest (but I have no idea; it could say “Fat Slut” and I’ll never know), and I was off to bake in the sun.
You’re supposed to essentially stand and let all the mud dry on you before you get in the water so that it can work all its magic, but that spot where my thighs touch never dried and I said, fuck it, this burns, I’m getting in the water. That burnt even more. If you have sensitive skin, you really can’t win at the Dead Sea. Literally everything burns. And don’t get me started on the poor screaming child not too far from me who got water in his eyes.
When you finish with your float, and more importantly, washing all the mud off yourself, there’s not much else to do. Yes, it’s beautiful, but snap a few photos, enjoy a few minutes, and you can be on your way. It was off to the showers again, to rinse off in cold water and put my perfectly dry clothes back on my sticky wet body in a room full of naked chicks.
Would I do it again? Nah, never. Do I recommend other people do it? If it’s on your bucket list, go for it. I’d just set your expectations low. And if you are as unfortunate as I am to have been born with sensitive skin, I might skip it (and do NOT put that mud on your face).
Have you been to the Dead Sea? Was your experience better?
